some days are worse than others. this, unfortunately, has turned into a whole week.
i am almost 30-years-old and still get homesick. i have lived away from this place for almost 7 years, have a beautiful, supportive, loving family of my own, the best in-laws i could ask for and i still want my mom and dad.
it's not just that, though [because, let's be honest: as much as i love being back where i feel most comfortable and in the house i still call 'home,' there is always a breaking point at which i want to turn around and run the other direction.]
it's all about what this 'home' represents that i am craving: genuine people, hard workers, kindness for days, creativity, appreciation for other people, familiarity, compassion, a fight-like-hell mentality without bringing others down, a village.
the last week has been unnoticeably and extraordinarily challenging for me. the cold of this northeast city, the looking down and avoiding eye-contact instead of looking people in the eye and smiling, the head shakes in frustration after getting off of an elevator full of women who love their lives, this tired and jaded approach to life has worn on me this week in ways that make me miss 'home.' some days i am strong enough to fight, other days my smile lines fade and i fit right in.
it's 10 degrees colder in that town, but the people are warm and today, more than other days, i miss that.